Jamie Lynne's Havin' Her a Hillbilly

Jamie Lynne is "in no rush to get married." She's "enjoying BEING SINGLE right now." "She didn't expect Casey to propose..." SICKKKKKKKKK what trash.

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Oh, is that how you enjoy single life? Yes at 17, dating only one hillbilly at a time must have become so burdensome. Especially with all that muddy dang four wheelin', the whoopin's and the barn party brawls. And being 7-8 months pregnant is a sure way to get the most from your single life.

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Vanilla is Out of the Slammer

Vanilla Ice has been released from jail but ordered by a Florida court to stay away from his wife following his arrest for domestic battery.

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On Thursday, the washed up loser’s spouse Laura reportedly called police claiming her husband - real name Robert Van Winkle - was kicking and hitting her at their Palm Beach County, Florida home. According to the arrest report, Laura Van Winkle appeared uninjured, but told cops she wanted a divorce from the angry loser.

Jessica's Sister is Overflowing With Joy

"My sister is overflowing with joy, Pete is an incredible soul"... the deep and insightful Jessica Simpson

Think Jessica made you sick before?

Jessica's Likes And Dislikes

1. Likes lovers with imagination. (Since she doesn't have any herself)
   
2. Dislikes portraying deep, dark movie roles because she's on a mission to make people happy. (or maybe it's because you can't portray ANY movie role, let alone a deep, dark, serious one)
   
3. Loves to kiss with eyes open because she can take in the entire situation and knows if she's enjoying it or not. (stupidest thing I ever heard)
   
4. Likes being addicted to high heels, even donning them to the beach. (Gayest addiction ever)
   
5. Likes Angelina Jolie's human nature and says she was the inspiration for her to consider adoption. (Do all kids a favor...and don't adopt)
   
6. Dislikes the attitude of Christian critics for blasting her raunchy video 'These Boots Are Made For Walking for being too sexy', insisting they should be more accepting. (of dumb whores everywhere)
   
7. Dislikes being pregnant so "early" in her life. (the reason she's had at least 2 abortions, one with Nick that he didn't want and one with John Mayer.)
   
8. Likes the singers Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston and Celine Dion.
   
9. Likes Dawson's Creek. (Grow up)
   
10. Used to like Justin Timberlake. (It figures)
    
11. Likes Cheerios for breakfast. (So unusual!) and interesting!
    

Apparently, she also dislikes washing her hair

What a moron, and she looks so "unclean"

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To My Loyal Readers

I'm not quite as lame as I may have seemed this week, I've been having serious computer probs, but I really was still trying to bring you all of the urgent news I was able to. Things seem like they are okay now!

Whitney Likes Her Hair Pulled During Sex

Ray J is Whitney Houston's boyfriend,

and it just so happens he's written a song about being Whitney's boyfriend. That is so... heavy, because the name of the song is "Boyfriend." He has exposed some personal details of his sex life with Whitney, very exciting! He also tries to make Bobby Brown mad in the song.

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The shocking revelation? Whitney likes her hair pulled during sex. Her wig or her real hair? Oh my. The thought of her real hair.... Anyway, he sings:
“Is that your wife, is that your shorty? Well I’m her boyfriend… I think the problem is you don’t beat it right… Making love is cool, just pull her hair hard sometimes.”

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Bobby writes about Ray J and Whitney's relationship in his book, The Truth, The Whole Truth And Nothing But….

“Their relationship doesn’t bother me. She’s open to see whoever she wants to see, just like I can see who I want to see. I know the age difference between her and the little guy is 20 years, but to each his own.

Quote of the Day

Ashlee Simpson will have fun being married to Pete Wentz. It seems he likes to dance around in her sister's shoes.

He says, “I love Jessica Simpson’s stuff, especially the shoes. I dance around my house in them all the time.”
Wow. What a "rebel."

NY Daily News Blind Item

Does adderall turn your tongue green? Just askingWhich show keeps its dim-witted if ultra-popular “reality” stars peppy with Adderall supplied by a producer in handfuls between scenes?

Robin Leaves Dr. Phil

Vanilla Ice is a Wife Beater

Nice "crazy eye" and haircut. Ugh.

Police arrested Vanilla Ice last night for beating up his wife at their Palm Beach home. Vanilla, real name Rob Van Winkle (his real name is gayer than his fake name) spent the night in jail while waiting to see the judge.

The Vanilla Ass was booked by Palm Beach County Sheriff’s deputies at 10:43 PM ET on a charge of domestic battery.
Deputies arrived at Van Winkle’s Wellington home around 7:15 p.m. to find him on his motorcycle, two blocks from their home, the Palm Beach Post reported. He said he left on his motorcycle so he and his wife could cool down.

“He started yelling at me for going out to buy a bedroom set. In front of my daughter,” she told a deputy, the arrest report says, according to the Post.

Vanilla told the officers his wife is bipolar, but is still prone to irrational behavior despite taking medication. Reports, however, show Van Winkle has already been booked twice on domestic battery and domestic dispute charges.

Kathy Finally Gets In The Tabloids/Blogs

Looks like Adnan had a good reason to replace Britney. Kathy Griffin sure is smokin'.. Like Kathy would give up her billionaire boyfriend, Apple founder Steve Wozniak for ADNAN. SICKKKKKKKKK (funny though, Kathy)

"Adnan is all man, and I couldn't be happier!" gushed Kathy.

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The lovebirds shop at Victoria's Secret so that Kathy can sizzle for Adnan

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Everyone thinks this is for Pop Fiction. I don't. It's too funny for Pop Fiction. No one is more unfunny than Ashton Kutcher. Except for maybe Tyra Banks. Kathy's always trying to go on a date with someone who will get her in the tabloids and blogs.

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Tyra Banks is Really, Really Funny

Tyra Banks bought a pair of work boots so that she could plant a tree in honor of her 600th episode. She sure is funny.

Oh hahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh Tyra, stop! Stop! You make the funniest faces!!!

Amy Winehouse Has Gross Stuff Living in Her Beehive

Oh oh, Amy, your thigh is caving in!

John Travolta is Obsessed With The Little Mermaid

Page Six says:
John Travolta has an 8-year-old daughter, but it looks as if he's the one obsessed with "The Little Mermaid." The pudgy "Pulp Fiction" star sat front row with daughter Ella at the Lunt-Fontanne Theatre on 46th Street Saturday, where he sang along to the show's tunes, including "Under the Sea." Afterward, he brought 26 of Ella's pals backstage and took pictures with the cast. "He was touching all the costumes, he looked amazed," said our spy. "He said he was way, way into the show." Gay? Nah.....

Rumer Willis Had a New Man.. for a Few Hours

“I love a lot of different things. I really like acting, I really like music and I love photography. In a perfect world I could do all three. “In the future, I would love to do an album. I have been singing since I was really little, which not a lot of people know about so it’s one of those fun, personal things.” the hideous troll that is Rumer Willis

Say.. isn't your face a personal thing? Why don't you keep that to yourself? Rumer was spotted at the clubs this week, even though she's not old enough to be in them, with Evan Ross, the son of Diana Ross. You guessed it, they were "all over eachother." Barf.