Sarah Jessica Parker crying after learning she was named the least sexy woman on earth
Paris crying because for the first time in her bitch life, she doesn't get her way
Amy cries because she is out of heroin
Lindsay cries after losing her purse at the airport with $3,000 worth of drugs in it
Britney crying because the paparazzi won't leave her alone, even though she calls them before she leaves the house to tell them where she's going
Katie Couric cries because she is a grinning demonic homewrecker, and not one person watches her newscast
Britney fails drug test
