Yeah that's sick, I know. But hurry up already, I'm so sick of her. I've been sick of her since Jenny from the block. And the "BENNIFER". Ugh. Oh, alright, she had three songs I liked back in 2001 and I bought her cd, ok? Now the world waits for her to have her C-section, clad in her custom cashmere gown while surrounded by her white lilly candles, her salsa mood music, her 900 thread count sheets, and of course, the ever loving Skeletor at her side, gently humming his only hit, "I Need to Know, tell me baby girl cause I need to know..."
While we're on the subject, why didn't I get to "schedule a C-section?" My daughter weighed 10 pounds, and I was in labor for 22 solid hours before they let me have a C! WTF! Then my son, who was born 13 months later was so big the Dr. thought he was "twins", and I didn't even get to schedule him. These stupid "celebs" (I hate that word) think they're so cool! J.Lo has been throwing her demands out at the hospital with her retarded "pink drills" (i case someone tries to kidnap her evil spawn) for weeks. She thinks her maternity room is backstage and had a rider a mile long of everything she expected, including a new toilet seat and Bugles corn chips. Get over yourself, J. Lo. We all remember what you looked like when you danced on "In Living Color" and you were short, fat, and covered in what appeared to be pubic hair.
