The Tattlebuzz: 2008-05-25

The Twins Have Arrived!

and ALL THOSE BRATS were in the delivery room when she had them.

Bill Murray: An Abusive Sex Addict

Bill Murray has been accused of being a sex addict
in divorce papers filed by his wife.
Bill & Jennifer, in happier times

bill murray

Jennifer Murray also claims the 57-year-old
Hollywood actor was addicted to marijuana
and alcohol during their ten years of marriage.

She has applied for a restraining order
against the Ghostbusters star, alleging that
she and their four young children were forced
to leave their $2million home in Charleston,
South Carolina, because of his scary behavior.

Mrs Murray claims her husband hit her
in the face on a regular basis,
and told her she was 'lucky
he didn't kill her'.

Jon Voight : A Winning Smile

Jon Voight apparently forgot to floss his teeth
before a DVD launch in Los Angeles yesterday

Kerry Katona is Hungry

New Mom and cokehead Kerry Katona scarfs down a burger

JayBey: The Most Boring Couple To Ever Walk The Earth

She's pregnant. Don't care.

Their baby will be jaw dropping, stomach churning ugly. Jay Z's fists are just itching to give her a smack down

No Offense, "NE-YO," But We Don't Believe You

Ne-Yo admits he had his doubts about Lindsay Lohan's vocal talents when he was asked to write a song for her upcoming third album, due later this year.

"I gotta admit, we were like ... 'Lindsay Lohan?'" Ne-Yo tells Billboard magazine. "I mean, I've written for Beyonce, Mary J. Blige, Rihanna, Celine Dion and ... Lindsay Lohan?"

But after hearing her sing on the track, called "Bossy," Ne-Yo says he and producer Stargate were so impressed that he called Lohan to say how sorry he was for not believing in her. "She did a ridiculously fabulous job," Ne-Yo tells the magazine. "I was so shocked I had to call her and apologize for what I was thinking because she did so good. I think the world is gonna be surprised."

Earlier this month Ne-Yo told People that he and Stargate approached the Lohan project "as a challenge. 'Can we make a song for Lindsay Lohan that people were gonna take seriously?' I think we did it," he said.

Biggest Loser Host Pregnant

The Biggest Loser host Caroline Rhea and her longtime boyfriend, Costaki Economopoulos, are expecting their first child, her rep confirms to PEOPLE.

Rhea, 44, is due in the fall. Caroline Rhea and her longtime boyfriend, Costaki Economopoulos, are expecting their first child, her rep confirms to PEOPLE. Start thinking of baby names that "go well" with Economopoulos.

Minibits

Joe Pesci is a pimp

Joe Simpson is a white trash, big fat freak who is an embarrassing slob, but oh I forgot he's a MAN OF GOD. PLEASE. Just like Michael Lohan!

Joe, you are so cool, wow. I like your friends. Wait.. you're not drunk are you? I thought you were a preacher! Didn't you have a wife.... I can't imagine why she is never ever seen with you, never! I mean, you look like you are so much fun, and you are smokingly hot too!

Steven Tyler, on his way to rehab for the 623rd time. NICE BOOTS. Like there is any hope for you, dude. Just accept yourself as you are, a crinkly old Neanderthal "rocker", a Mick Jagger wannabe, who has no style, can't sing, and hasn't had a good album since 1975's Toys in the Attic.

and the story here is???? WHO CARES

Like she's old enough to feel left out, like she's LONELY. She's highly overrated, but she has no way of knowing that yet, that's later

Woody Harrelson, absolutely insane, nothing to look at, has never done anything, wasn't even good in Cheers, dad was a killer, he goes skinny dipping with Owen Wilson

Gwen Stefani is always pregnant, always looks good.

Gavin looks like a really boring dude. Does he do anything? He just stands around gazing off into the distance. Dude needs to round up Bush and get something going ASAP. Seriously, I miss them so much

Lindsay and her hubby were leaving the Sex and the City party, when Lindsay threatened paparazzi with an umbrella. So un-original
Hey, Lindsay? We know you're a lesbian, and it doesn't matter to us, you're gross either way. The saddest day of your life will be when there are no photographers, trust. Love those shoes though

Liza Minelli Has Cool Eyebrows

I don't mean to be unkind, but does anyone on earth care about Liza Minelli? No, really. What does she sing? Oh yeah, "New York, New York!" Oh wow that's a fresh song, not stale at all.

Is there any chance that she thinks her eyebrows look good? Do people actually pay to see her?

Pete Wentz is REALLY REALLY Funny

OMG! Stop! Stop, Pete! No, I'm serious! You're making my sides hurt! OMG You're SO FUNNY!! Pretending that your bagel is a cellphone, Oh Hahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe I never thought of that myself!!!

OMG is that Pete behind that paper plate?? Is he really offering to sell ads on his face? Oh hahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stop it, Pete, I mean it this time. What does the plate say? Douchebag? OMG Hahahahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't even catch my breath!

Bad News, Kate: Hippies Aren't "Cool"

Ryder is cute, despite his mother's attempt to force him to be a "hippie."

I hate people who try to be things they aren't. Especially things that were NEVER COOL. Kate? You're not a "hippie," except maybe for the way you smell, because everyone is well aware that you don't bathe. UGH
Do you think you could wash and brush his hair at least? NO, CUT HIS HAIR. Let him decide if he wants to be an ugly freak like his dad and Celine Dion's son when he gets older

I know you think you're cool, but your misplaced arrogance, coupled with the fact that you're a dirty, know-it-all slut, is really not cool

Your movies suck too! Your first one was good, but then you thought you were going to win an Oscar, so all the ones after that have sucked.
when did you get so ugly?

My daughter told me you were a freak a long time ago, and I didn't listen. But you are. CUT. HIS. HAIR.

Carrie Underwood She AIN'T

Breathy. Corny. Desperate. Loser. Please stop singing. These were my thoughts when hearing Jessica Simpson's sad attempt at singing country. Oh, and god...she's ugly.

For a treat, here are the lyrics, because they are so mind numbingly heavy that I thought it would help you to understand her deep and introspective lyrical genius, which she shares with her sister:
Leave your dishes
In the sink
Leave the ice cubes
In your drink
Just come on over
Leave your coat
Behind the door
Leave your laundry
On the floor
Just come on over

I need you know
I need you bad
I need you, baby
Looking just like that

Don't pack your bag
Don't make me wait
I wanna kiss that smile
That's on your face
I need you
Wrapped up
In these arms
I want you
Just the way you are
Come on over

Baseball cap
And torn-up jeans
A pair of flip-flops
On your feet
Just come on over
Don't slow down
Don't stop for gas
Keep those four wheels
Spinning fast
Just come on over
Listen if you dare:
http://www.wqik.com/pages/js_firstlisten.html

Assholes

Hulk and Hulk Jr. visit Nick in prison

If you didn't hear the sickening banter between The Hogan's jail convo's here is some more:

Hulk: "Well, I don't know what type of person John was. Or what he did to get himself in this situation. I know he was pretty aggressive and yelled at people and do stuff. And for some reason God laid some heavy shit on that kid. I don't know what he was into."

Nick: "He was a negative person.

Hulk: "He was what?"

Nick: "He was a negative person. Will you work on that Real-Ality deal?"

Hulk: "Yep"

Nick: "Get that lined up so the minute I walk out...wherever I walk out of it's there...boom."

Hulk: "Can you do it while you're on probation?"

Nick: "Of course."

Hulk: "Do you want to do it with Pink Sneakers or someone else?"

Nick: "I want to do it where I'll make the most money."
Hulk: "You got it, BUBBA."
I have to throw up now.
Okay, here's what it really looked like

Patrick Swayze is "Doing Well"

In his first public appearance since announcing he has deadly pancreatic cancer, Patrick Swayze and his wife Lisa were at a Lakers Playoff game on Friday. He told People Magazine:

Thought I’d give you guys a little update. Lisa and I have been back and forth from New Mexico enjoying the arrival of spring and new baby calves. This past weekend, we spent a fun time with friends in Reno for Lisa’s birthday, where I took her jewelry shopping at Kenny G & Company and we were able to find her something really special and much deserved! In the meantime, I am continuing treatment at Stanford and the great news is I continue to respond well.

Jamie Lynne Has it All Together

Jamie Lynne is complaining to pals that she doesn't want to get married with a "big gut." Someone should explain to her that her big gut is actually a baby. A hillbilly, but still, a baby. In Touch Weekly reports:

Jamie Lynn and Casey are expected to move into their new home soon but still have not set a wedding date. “I don’t want to get married with a big gut under my dress,” a witness heard Jamie Lynn say while shopping. There are also whispers that tension remains between Jamie Lynn and her parents over the marriage.

However, her sister Britney is impressed with how well Jamie Lynn is coping. “I am so proud of my sister,” Britney was recently overheard saying. “She seems to really have it all together.” Well. if Britney thinks she "has it all together" then she must!

Jamie Lynn and Casey have reportedly picked out the name for the little one, whenever she does make her grand entrance into the world. According to the weekly entertainment magazine their favorite name that they have picked out so far is Emma Jo Jean. If it should be a lil' hillbilly boy, his name would be LeRoy Dean or Harley Bob.