Lauren Hill Pregnant With Fifth Child (By a man who has dissapeared)





Lauren Hill, who is now completely insane, is pregnant with her 5th baby by Rohan Marley, son of Bob. Unfortunately, Rohan is nowhere to be found, and doesn't plan on coming back. Wonder why...

You Lose, Mrs. Cruise


LOOK, EVERYBODY! I TOLD YOU I WASN'T GAY!





"I had your poster for Top Gun above my bed!"
"Don't get too excited, Kate.. I'm really, really GAY!"


Uh! Oh! Whoops.. What the F*ck have I done... ...








Listen To Tom... Must only listen to Tom...





Great. Not only is he gay, he's fat now too.

What in God's name am I wearing?

Wait.. how do I do this "smiling" thing again?

When they first announced their powerful love to the world, their gigantic fake grinning smiles filled us all with.. nausea. What happened to their all consuming devotion? I guess being married to a short, controlling, greasy haired gay man with a face like a rat isn't all it's cracked up to be. Ha! Ha!

One Legged Gold Digger Turns Down 60 Million


Paul McCartney can't even rid himself of this ugly, sickening, one legged skank for sixty million dollars! This bitch wants twice that much or more. She used to be a cheap whore (see Denise Richards) and live in a dumpster. He's a moron though, no prenup.

We're Never Gonna Survive Unless We Get a Little Crazy

Britney's Album Cover

Lindsay is High on Herself




Lindsay has a high opinion of herself. UGH. She is buying a house in Utah and moving there. For like, a month or two. She says for good. Ha! Ha! She's been buying a bunch of stuff at Best Buy two days in a row.

Blind Items



#1 This absolute stunner of a B list film actress looked even more gorgeous the other night in her full length evening gown. What didn't look so good was her doing line after line of coke in the restroom, and then falling down on said restroom floor right in a puddle of water. The $10,000 dress was ruined which didn't make the designer happy either.

#2 This washed out female singer has been suffering from the drug abuse flu and a breakup with her wandering eyed actor boyfriend.

source: crazydays and nights

Jim Carrey & His Daughter


Jim Carrey and 20 year old daughter, Jane

STOP EXERCISING!

OMG They Might Dig Up Anna's Body


California Attorney General Jerry Brown says that he requested the search warrants executed earlier today in connection with the death of Anna Nicole Smith because, he believes, "a serious crime has been committed."
There is a possibility they will exhume her body. Oh boy, here we go.

J. Lo Will LOVE THIS

Jennifer Lopez was just Jenny from the block --big, fat, and clumsy Jenny from the block, when she got her start, says squeaky-voiced Rosie Perez in the new issue of Out magazine. Rosie says it was she, not Keenan Ivory Wayans, who hired Lopez as a dancer on the hit '90s comedy show "In Living Color." "He didn't want her because she was overweight and didn't dance well, but I said, 'she has star quality.'

Ha! Ha! Good for Rosie Perez. You know J. Lo will have a hit out on her now. Enjoy this short clip from J. Lo's short, fat and dumpy days.

Nicole Still Fits Into her Old Bikini


image: collegehumor

Look-A-Likes

Breaking Up With Britney







Okay, it's really happened. I cannot post one more picture of Britney going to tan, getting a frappucino, or her filthy weave up close. Now that she has pink eye, she has her sunglasses on, even at night, and now.. to "read." Can you say child star? Why is a 26 year old "woman" pretending to read this classic children's book? (In her car with her sunglasses on, while she poses, (brandishing her pumpkin!) for the paparazzi in between.) For months now, really, even years, we have been witnessing the major meltdown of a child star, because, really, Britney isn't a talent. She was a creation, something manufactured, and now the factory has shut down.

She was the product of choreographers, publicists, stylists, songwriters, record labels, trainers, voice coaches, agents, and long hours of practice and discipline. Now she is only in the news for being gross, showing us her crotch, eating cheetos, having acne, sleeping with strange men and women, being attacked, losing her kids, getting into accidents, marrying anyone she can find, pooping in gas station bathrooms, beating cars with umbrellas, shaving her head in public, sucking on drug laced lollipops, and being a vulgar, stupid, ugly, joke. (Who DECORATES her car with pumpkins and little girls' tennis shoes) I just can't take it anymore. I really can't.

Could she ever really sing? No. Dance? No. Did she used to look good? Of course. But that was a long, long time ago. Why does anyone still care? I'm not sure she has the ability to shock us anymore. I am going to do my best to ignore Britney from this moment on, and put myself in a kind of Britney rehab. Wish me luck. Pic (2) of Brit with her new "friend"... her friend is EXTRA ugly! She needs a nose job NOW, she always looks like she's smelling something.

Nude Dude Runs Errands in Times Square



Nude dude Josh Drimmer went for a leisurely stroll through New York City’s Times Square, flaunting his junk (from the size of the blur, it doesn’t look like it was worth flaunting) for the tourists, homeless, TRL fans to poke fun at.

After every police officer, firefighter, and EMT in New York and neighboring New Jersey responded (yay tax dollars!), Drimmer was arrested and sent off to Bellevue Hospital (aka the nut house) for evaluation.

“He was a strange guy,” said a man who lived in Drimmer’s Yale dorm during freshman year. “He would do weird things. He would eat scraps of food people left around for a couple of hours.”

source: Splash

Not So Fast, Shar


Okay, here are your two finalists for Celebrity Rap Superstar. Kendra is cute, but can't rap. The best part is watching Hugh Hefner in the audience trying to pretend that he can see, hear, or, knows what the hell is going on. You know that jealous bitch Holly doesn't want to be there. And Shar? Yeah, she can rap. But last night bitch thought she was funny, rappin, "I shoulda opened the VMA's". WTF? I don't think so, Shar. Britney is a mess right now, but you're no Britney, bitch. Besides, if it wasn't for her, your loser baby daddy wouldn't have any money for you, would he? So, since you are technically living off Britney, maybe you should shut the f**k up. Nice shiny truckdriver/hunting outfit though.

Rihanna Dates Farmer With Unibrow


Rihanna,19, and Josh Hartnett, 29, were spotted making out at the Pink Elephant in NYC last night according to UsWeekly.

The two were also on TRL together yesterday. Apparently they were drinking Dom Perignon and Pink vodka throughout the night. What does ANYONE see in this unibrowed loser? He looks exactly like this farm boy with bad breath who used to carry a greasy sack lunch and ride my bus.

Case Reopened in Anna Nicole's Death


California Attorney General Jerry Brown is expected to hold a press conference later today to explain why the hell California Department of Justice investigators have been serving search warrants all over the state today. The warrants are believed to be a part of the investigation by California authorities into the death of Anna Nicole Smith.

Several people close to the model have fallen under suspicion since her death, including her psychiatrist Dr. Khristine Eroshevich.

The Medical Board of California said in April it was investigating Eroshevich, who, according to documents, authorized all 11 prescription medications found in Smith's hotel room the day she died. Eroshevich who loved making long distance house calls to those who could afford it traveled with Anna to Florida.

More than 600 pills, including 450 muscle relaxants, were missing from prescriptions that were no more than five weeks old, that's a whopping 600 pills in 35 days. That works out to about 20 pills a day which means that about a pill an hour was being ingested. We will know more after the press conference.

source: crazydaysandnights

They Are Basking in the Glow of Their Marital Bliss



Katie Holmes looks more haggard and beat down every time I see her! She was young, like... a second ago, well, before she met Cruise. He's even looking pretty beat himself. He's still making that boring Nazi movie, and she's still shopping. Enjoy the photo of Katie, taken before Tom ruined her life, and looks.