Lose The Tude, Fatty

Bad news, Fatso, you don't own Italy/ look at her. stance. Like she owns the world, ugh. Like she's so great. Hasn't anyone told her that big blubbery chicks don't wear white?

Get over yourself, "O", WE HAVE.

Halle and Her Man Go To Stevie Wonder Concert

YAWN

Fake and corny couple, Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo, go out to dinner. BORINGGGGGGGGGGG, hey, Tony, love your cheapass cornball cowboy shirt. UGH

They look like a couple of hillbillies

Brooke Hogan is a Man

Brooke Hogan and her troll like pal enjoy diner at The Waverly Inn

GROSSSSSSSSSS They're both so ugly and think they're cool!

Quote of the Day

"Where is his judgement? Anyone that would run the risk of completely destroying this wonderful life, where is his judgement?

"Anybody that would chase a teenager, a young girl, I mean, where is his judgement? I mean, sneaking out of the house when you've got beautiful, loving children there, to go choose instead to masturbate on the World Wide Web, just makes me worry about his judgement."

Sting Doesn't Like Pete! Why?!

Sting is furious that his (UGLY) 17 year old daughter, Coco, has been getting cozy with the lovable Pete Doherty.

Give Sweet Pete a break, I say! Look at Coco! What a little squinty eyed bitch!

Tatum O' Neal Pleads Guilty To Drug Charges

Above, Tatum with her Oscar. Below, Fresh looking Tatum, who has always maintained that she is "clean" from drugs

Actress Tatum O’Neal, who was arrested for attempting to buy crack, pled guilty yesterday in New York.

The 44-year-old actress paid a $95 fee and walked out of Manhattan Criminal Court with a smile and a renewed pledge to stay away from the drugs that have plagued her career.

“I’m going back to my meetings and back to my life,” O’Neal said.

She didn’t comment on her vacillating stories about how she turned back to drugs because her dog died or alternatively because she was researching for a new role as a drug addict.

Steve-O Goes Back to the Nuthouse

Poor Steve-O released this statement:

I've been clean now for 115 days, and I'm, again, in a mental institution. I did so much cocaine, ketamine, pcp, nitrous oxide, and all sorts of other drugs, that, quite simply, my brain is f----d up.

He adds that though his "cognitive skills are alright ... I frequently suffer from horrible mood swings and severe depression."

...medication that is prescribed to me doesn't do the trick every day. I'm back in the looney bin trying to get that s---t right.

The bottom line is that doing drugs f----d my a-- up, and I'm going to be paying for it for a long time, probably for the rest of my life. Everyone's going to make their own decisions in life, but nobody needs to make the same mistakes I made."

Another Fun Day in Court for Christie

Radiant Christie arrives at her divorce hearing

Beautiful Christie Brinkley arrives for another day in court, to suffer through more humiliating testimony

Wormy Scumbag Peter Cook arrives in court with bodyguards to protect him from Christie's fans

Ahoy, Matey!

Can't a friendly lesbian couple have any privacy?Ellen and Portia share a passionate kiss in Sardonia, Italy, believing they are safe from the prying eyes of the paparazzi

OMG. Your Morning Stomach Ache

Here's just some of the things Ranae Shrider had to say about sex with Mini-Me:
on sexual positions:

"I had to kneel down just to give him a hug. And anything but the traditional missionary position was just impossible. So I'd lie on the bed and Verne would crawl up my legs to have sex with me. And as he did it his feet would be tickling my knees!"

on Mini-Me's ween:

"It wasn't quite as passionate as sex with a normal-sized man but he did his best. He didn't wear a condom. There was no point, they're all too big."

on Mini-Me's sexual appetite :

"It was strange having sex with someone who couldn't reach to kiss me at the same time, except for my tummy that is! I was so relieved it was over. But minutes later Verne was ready to go again. That night we made love three times in 20 minutes, which most bigger men only dream about doing."

on almost drowning Mini-Me:

"I thought it would be fun to do it in the tub. Sadly, I almost killed him. (That would have probably been for the best)

While Verne was watching TV I ran the bath, emptied a bottle of bubbles in it and called him in. But the bubbles were so thick and high that once he climbed in he got lost under the water and I couldn't see him. Verne's voice is just like it is in the films and as he disappeared under the water, I heard this tiny yelp for help. I could just hear him crying, ‘Ranae, I can't see! Get me out, I'm drowning!'

I'm Holding My Breath

Haggard Homewrecker Releases Statement

"My husband and I are not planning on getting a divorce. I know Alex Rodriguez through Guy Oseary, who manages both of us. I brought my kids to a Yankee game. I am not romantically involved in any way with Alex Rodriguez. I have nothing to do with the state of his marriage or what spiritual path he may choose to study.”

Cherry Kookoo

Courtney Love finally explains her behavior on her blog:

just want to thank all you supportive lovely people and thank you for putting up with my kookoo bananas alter ego should; we give her a name?

should we give my alter ego a name? hmnmmmm Cherry! “Cherry kookoo” so if /when im overcome and blog again which i wont do i took a picture of a friend looking at me rather sternly to remind me not to- well know it was Cherry Kookoo, but i think I’ve killed her off.
back to my shopping basket! Your support means the world to me i read every comment!
rock on

Nicole Richie Needs To Grow Up

Nicole Richie, a dumb bitch who can't keep her mouth shut, was thrown out of The Hard Rock Hotel last night. TMZ reports:

We’re told Nicole was involved in an altercation around 1 AM this morning Sunday, July 6, with a female while in line at the valet outside the Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas. Sources say Richie was so out of control she had to be escorted off the property by security!

The photo was taken early last night at Wasted Space inside the Hard Rock, where we’re told Nicole was partying with Carey Hart and the boys from Good Charlotte.

Fatso Oprah Piles on the Pounds... AGAIN

Oprah shows off several chins as she enjoys her Italian holiday

Following a brief trip to Britain, where she attended Nelson Mandela's 90th birthday party, the famous fatty flew to Italy for a well-earned break.

Joined by secret lover Gayle King, the 54-year-old has been enjoying the sights of picturesque Portofino, one of this summer's most popular celeb hotspots.

Yummy: Oprah enjoys a tasty treat as she relaxes with Gayle King, her lesbo companion

After browsing local shops and signing autographs for fans, a relaxed Oprah enjoyed some alfresco dining as she sipped a drink and munched on olives while chatting with Gayle.

Fatso kiss-ass enjoys a cruise in Portofino's harbour

Tom Cruise is a Fatass

Tom Cruise was spotted showing off his back fat and fat ass on a hiking trip in Colorado.

The gay 5'5" Cruise and Holmes, 29, spent the long weekend with their family at their Telluride home in the Centennial State to celebrate America's Independence Day.

Wide around the middle: Tom Cruise with his family after a hike in Colorado

In between joining the locals for the national holiday festivities, Cruise enjoyed a hike in the hot sun around the nearby mountains.

After arriving back from his walk, a sweaty Cruise showed off his expanding girth as he stripped off by his car.

Earlier in the weekend, Cruise showed his patriotic side as he donned a cowboy hat, (which he looked ridiculous in) for a day out with Holmes, daughter Suri, 2, and 13-year-old son Conner.

Holmes' decreasing weight has attracted media attention in recent months.
Cruise was reported to have banned Holmes from discussing diets with super-skinny friend Victoria Beckham.

Instead it was left to Suri to steal the limelight as she was decked out with two American flags waving from her bright red headband.
Suri's proud patriotic display comes after Cruise recently said he was 'amazed' by his daughter.

'She likes to dance and sing, get her nails done with mom - really beautiful,' he said.

Minibits

Jake Gyllenhaall is really gay, and doesn't Reese know?

Cynthia Nixon's husband is grosser than Samantha Ronson even! He looks nice though

The pregnant "man" had a baby. Nice pits. I'm sick of this stupid story. like it's a man! It's a woman who thinks she's a man, so it's not a man. The thing had a baby girl, who will grow up hating life and herself

Mick Jagger is old

Katie Holmes is an evil fag hag, Suri has $100 bill