Lindsay Lohan's whore mother is starting to film her reality show for E! and it doesn't have a title yet. How about "The Non-Stop Ramblings of a Coked Up Skank" or "Crackheaded Soccer Mom" or "It Takes ALOT of Coke to be THIS UGLY and Annoying."
According to Dina, the show will star her skinny, ugly, no talent younger daughter, Ali, and Dina herself. LiLo may even make an appearance, as well. Momma Lohan told press, “Lindsay is a family member and will lend a helping hand if Ali asks her, when she’s in the recording studio.”
She tells press that the show is all about giving the public a correct view of her family. “There are so many misconceptions about me and my family. I’m setting the record straight.” (We are even more sickening than people know!")
Oh, and it’s also about victory in the single motherhood department. “It’s about empowering women to be successful single mothers. (And she's done a great job!) About being in the limelight without compromising motherhood. It’s about what I do, how you can be successful, and be a single mom and fulfilling your kids’ dreams. Working is my sole source of income.” (Working her kids to death at any cost, that is)
But wait… there’s more…“It won’t just be following my family around like other shows. It’ll show me cultivating careers, going to soccer practice. I’m a big supporter of domestic violence charities, so they’ll show that. Then they’ll show Cody at soccer practice. Ali going to school and in the studio. It’ll encompass everything. You’ll see me having five business meetings in the city.” (Cocaine is a hell of a drug, as Rick James would say!)
Wow, that sounds really interesting, and action packed. Why not have the show depict your real life, meeting drug dealers who short you on your stuff, having sex right at the table in a restaurant while the people who are trying to eat become sick, and your plastic surgeries, which have gone horribly wrong. Also, don't forget to throw in your ridiculous lies, outrageous bragging, and how much you have in common with Oprah.
